Your WHY isn't what is sabotaging you
Millions of people across the world are currently in the swing of a new year working towards achieving their goals. Now that most of us have returned back to work after Christmas life has returned to its normal patterns which may have left you wondering whether or not your why is big enough to really achieve this year’s resolution. I’m here to tell you that your why has nothing to do with whether you succeed this year or not. Read on to learn more.
We’ve all heard it before. You need to know your why, once you know your why and become deeply connected to it, it will be easy to achieve your goals. WRONG. There isn’t once person who didn’t know the reason for why they started a diet, went to the gym, started a new hobby, saved for an investment or decided that this year would be the year they would travel to the other side of the world on an adventure. We all know the reason, we are often deeply connected to it however we lack the deep connection with ourselves.
We want to lose the weight to be healthier and happier but we don’t actually know how we feel about health and fitness. We don’t actually want to get up a sweat 5 days a week in the gym or on the pavement because it feels more like a chore and less like fun. We don’t know what healthier and happier looks like for us. We don’t know this because we haven’t shut off the world of technology, magazines, peoples’ opinions & societal expectation to ask ourselves ‘what does health & happiness mean to me?’ This is a question that doesn’t have a fixed answer, it changes over time. Often when we take the time to ask ourselves what health and happiness looks like we get a far more holistic view of our life as opposed to the view we have decided we will go about pursuing. For me I always said health was working out, resting, not being stressed yet I often emphasised the working out part and I had to work hard to even accept that rest was something that I was allowed to have & so unsurprisingly my stress levels suffered for it. For over 3 years now my health routine now involves meditating, regular massages, disconnecting from technology & simply doing nothing. I have even been to the gym just for a sauna! Sounds outrageous doesn’t it!
The same concept goes for happiness. What does happiness mean to me? Is it doing what is comfortable or doing something that stretches myself, puts me out of my comfort zone? Is it a relationship that constantly makes me question who I am and how lovable I am or is it something that adds a significant amount of value to my life? Is happiness even something I consider to be worth pursuing or is it about being a realist and just ‘accepting what is?’ I could honestly ask you question after question about this topic. Again like health you most probably know what happiness looks like to you, its a matter or ensuring that you live a life just as you describe day in and day out.
It’s not about knowing your why, you know your why, you know what you want, its about allowing yourself to have what you want. It’s about trusting yourself to know that you can deliver what you want for yourself. Often we stumble and get frustrated with ourselves because we feel as though we fail at our first hurdle on the road to goal achieving success however the reality is that stumbling is actually a given and failing to prepare for it is a mistake.
As you approach this week I want you to think about what you are doing that SHOWS your body, mind & soul LOVE. I want you to also think about how you have prepared yourself (primed your mind) for potential hurdles you may face- what strategies do you have to pick yourself back up again? By choosing to look at your actions and not allowing yourself to listen to the words you say you’ll start to see a shift in what you do. You’ll start to notice that perhaps you are talking the actions but not talking and walking the self love and this awareness alone will drive a new way of being where your actions dictate your talk.
You know that actions speak louder than words. You know it because your body feels better when you take action in spite of fear. You know it because when someone else takes action instead of just talking you know they are invested. You also know how talking about health, happiness & success yet not taking any action FEELS. It feels like guilt, regret, frustration, pity, shame. By focussing on your talk you are letting your emotions drive the actions instead of silencing them with feelings of happiness, adrenaline, high energy, vitality, productivity, success by taking action first. Tell your talk that its time to shut up and listen, sabotage ends right here and right now!